A Football Poem: The English Way Of Playing Football

Jose Mourinho was so
very angry,
He thought Manchester
United should’ve had a

They nearly won their
game with Arsenal,
But the game finished
1-1 – instead of 1-0.

Gareth Southgate is
now England’s new
He should be paid on
results – so he’d be
working for a loss!

The England dummies
gave their lead away,
So back came Spain –
and made England’s

The FA English Premier
League is now sold to
So the Chinese can enjoy
all the football – with pot
noodles and Cola!

The world is the oyster
to clamber for more,
To watch the English
Premier League – the
Chinese do adore!

The next country is
Dubai – well, anything
is possible!
All the ‘oil-rich’ Arabs –
they are clearly

They could enjoy our
football and the England
Dubai versus England –
my God – what a dream!

Even America are lovers
of our sport,
Just like Donald Trump –
they love to cavort!

The English FA are in
new’ negotiations –
With Egypt and Cleopatra –
while holding wild

But let’s now be honest,
for the England star
They need to improve –
or they’ll all be in tears.

Money! Money! Money –
it is all about money,
Drinking and partying –
and acting so phoney!

The world watches on
as England move on,
Will they start winning –
and be number one?

I can’t help but wonder
why England are now
We don’t like the cold –
and we do hate: ‘Jack


Written by Darryl Ashton Darryl Ashton

Follow Darryl on Twitter @AlfGarnettJnr

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ALSO: Please check out Darryl’s two fascinating new books – one on football poetry: My Crazy World of Football Poetry, and the more politically-inducing: My Amazing World of Poems and Political Satire. Both are available to order on Amazon.