Connect in the back of the net

I am a very rich footballer,
and I play for Manchester
I flew in to Manchester –
on my private jet, because
I was invited.

I wear a lot of bling, as
jewelry I do love,
And as I’m worth millions,
a gift from my lord, above.

My agent did the haggling,
and he really earned his
But he doesn’t like the
media – he thinks they
are so phony!

But he is my business
agent – and I have to
pay him right.
Even on my private
jet – we have a drink
when on-flight.

I am a proud Frenchman,
but I chose the English
Premier League,
Earning all that lovely
money – it causes mass

I’m only 23 – and I am
now very rich.
Earning absolutely millions,
‘isn’t life a bitch!’

Nearly £90 million pounds,
in English currency,
But the press revealed all –
we wanted our secrecy!

There is NO limits of the
money – in the English
Premier League,
And playing for Man United,
is a dream I had indeed.

But will I perform with
honours – and be a Man U
Or will I be a total flop –
and throw a great big
French fit?

I have to thank the
“Special One” – he
dug deep into his pockets.
Spending serious money –
on one player who stands
as tall as a rocket!

But I don’t think I’m worth
this money – it creates a
lot of pressure.
I can’t justify it all – I need
to reassure.

We have to win some
trophies, and make the
Reds win more.
Because I can’t afford to
be a flop – I really need to

The big day is this weekend,
when I’ll be judged for sure.
And only scoring goals will
do – success is the perfect

The boardroom will be
watching – and so will Jose
Will I be a mega-hit? Just
watch – and find out more!

My name is Paul Pogba, and
I play for Manchester United.
I’m earning millions of pounds,
‘oh I’m so excited!’

But the fans will have to pay
up – as prices are to rise.
They have to pay my wages –
‘oh what a lovely surprise!’

The special one has chosen
me – as a saviour for Man U.
And all that lovely money –
paid to me, from YOU!

Now let me get started –
but first a drink at the bar;
‘My lords, ladies and
gentlemen – please welcome –
Paul Pogba.’

Written by Darryl Ashton 

Follow Darryl on Twitter @AlfGarnettJnr

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ALSO: Please check out Darryl’s two fascinating new books – one on football poetry: My Crazy World of Football Poetry, and the more politically-inducing: My Amazing World of Poems and Political Satire. Both are available to order on Amazon.