My name is Donald Trump I am the new U.S. President, Now I will change things – and make a mega statement. We are going to have our lunch – at my inaugural ceremony – From ‘lobster’ to ‘roast beef-steaks’ – it’s cost me a lot of money. I will also watch some soccer – 

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Jose Mourinho was so very angry, He thought Manchester United should’ve had a penalty. They nearly won their game with Arsenal, But the game finished 1-1 – instead of 1-0. Gareth Southgate is now England’s new boss. He should be paid on results – so he’d be working for a loss! The England dummies gave 

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UK football has now commenced today, The Championship is underway as the teams come out to play. Also in Division One, the teams will all do battle. To kick off another season – players running round like cattle. There’s also Division Two – where lesser teams are based. But they all play for promotion – 

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The big bosses of the England FA, have made their final decision, They’ve found a new boss for the England team position. They sat round a boardroom, table scratching all their heads, Wondering who to appoint – when they’d rather be home in their comfy beds! Behold! Sam Allardyce, is now in the hot seat, 

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The football season is soon to start My TV and footy will never part. In August it kicks off and the crowds all roar, Especially if your team does always score. To watch those players earn their dough, But sometimes a game can be so slow. The English Premier League is where it is, Watching 

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I wish I was a footballer in the English Premier League, I’d be a millionaire you see – as it’s full of mass intrigue. Chorus: He wants to be a footballer and earn a lot of money. Welcome to the English Premier League, the land of milk and honey. I’d play so good and earn my pay, 

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Let’s hear it for the Iceland team – they played with flair and skill. But the mighty “skills” of England – I had to pop a pill! The millionaires of the England squad, couldn’t match Iceland, They should have called on Accrington Stanley I’m sure they’d lend a hand! The mighty egos of the England 

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